10 years ago I thought happiness is a hard work. Now I realize being happy is much simpler

There is a well-known Jewish saying that being cheerful and kind to others is also an act of goodness, just like helping those in need. I have read countless books on how to be happy, but this simple statement resonated with me on a much deeper level.

Everyone wants to be happy, but it’s not as easy as it seems. If it were, there wouldn’t be thousands of books, talk shows, and seminars dedicated to the art of happiness. But why is something so seemingly simple so difficult to attain?

It’s because, from the moment we are born, our minds absorb layers upon layers of beliefs—many of them limiting or negative. Society, family, and culture teach us that if we are not smart enough, not beautiful enough, not exceptional “like someone else’s child,” then we are not worthy of love. And so, we pass these same beliefs down to our children, because people can only speak from the limits of their own understanding.

And so, generation after generation, we chase happiness in success, money, and relationships. Yet, no matter how far we run in the race of life, happiness always seems just out of reach—appearing for a moment only to disappear again. In the end, happiness is not a destination, nor is it something external. It has always been within us, something we were born with. We don’t need to search for happiness; we just need to remember the happiness we naturally had as children.

But the mind constantly reminds us that we are not worthy of happiness—because we haven’t achieved this or that, because we have been conditioned to believe so. And no matter how many books we read, how many meditation retreats we attend, or how deeply we understand philosophy, if we do not feel happiness, it will remain distant.

However, what if we shift our perspective? What if we see our own happiness as a way to help those around us? What if, by choosing joy, we create a space where our children can grow up in love and security, where they feel confident in facing life’s challenges?

So, I will learn to live with happiness, not just for myself, but for those I love. I will practice speaking words of love—not only to others but to myself—because I, too, deserve love.

On days when I feel like I am not a good enough mother, a good enough partner, or when my mind is clouded with negativity, those are the days I must be even more gentle with myself. I will tell myself, over and over, that I am worthy of love. And as I continue to teach this truth to my own heart, one day it will believe me. And when that happens, I will finally be open to receiving all the beauty that life has to offer.